Perched in our citadels, a few admittedly smirked, as those who lacked foresight before Sasser and Netsky fought night, day, and weekend to rebuild their broken networks after two of Computerdom’s Most Preventable Disasters. But the toll was no laughing matter. Billions and billions down the tube.

In due course, the teen perp met swift Justice… Eighteen months’ probation plus a job with an Internet security outfit. Fame has obtained, with Fortune soon to follow. (Even his pals win. They get to split the $250,000 reward.)

So what’s a boondock-bound parent to do? You could encourage your kid to grind through a quarter million dollar college education, then, in mid-twenties, start at the bottom rung of some very long corporate ladder…

Or, in lieu of piano lessons, hire a Java tutor… and hope for a world-levelling computer virus that creates a post-teen multi-millionaire celebrity.

A bit of fatherly advice: Tell the kid to leave enough fingerprints to get caught.